THERE IS NOTHING MORE SOLITARY THAN THE ACT OF WRITING. YET, NO WORK MAKES IT TO PUBLICATION IN SOLITUDE. MY LATE MOTHER’S LAST BIRTHDAY BROUGHT THIS HOME TO ME. THRIVING IN THIS SOLITARY PROFESSION TURNS OUT TO REQUIRE AN ECOSYSTEM. HERE’S HOW TO GROW YOURS. We celebrated my mother’s 97th birthday, her next-to-last, in 2012, […]
WRITERS, AND THEIR FATHERS (PLUS, A STRIPPER NAMED MARGIE)
“IT MUST BE IN YOUR DNA,” PEOPLE SOMETIMES TELL ME, ON LEARNING THAT I AM THE DAUGHTER OF WRITERS. BECAUSE THIS OVERLOOKS THE SOLITARY, INDIVIDUAL WORK I PUT INTO WHAT I DO, IT USED TO BUG ME. YET HAVING A RELATIONSHIP THAT WAS AS COLLEGIAL AS IT WAS FAMILIAL WITH MY FATHER, INFLUENCED ME. HOWEVER, […]
MOTHERLESS MOTHER’S DAY: GROWING SELF-COMPASSION
MOTHER’S DAY, IN ITS INSISTENCE ON SENTIMENT, BIOLOGY, AND CONSUMERISM, HAS ALWAYS DIMINISHED MOTHERING. FOR MOTHERING HAS ALWAYS BEEN MUCH BIGGER THAN MOTHERHOOD. AND IT TRANSCENDS REPRODUCTION. EVEN GENDER. Being a mother, and having a mother, even when it works beautifully, even in times of general robust public health and political stability, is never as […]
NOT EVEN SPRING CAN HURRY GRIEF ALONG
WHAT DO WE DO WHEN, IN THIS SEASON OF RENEWAL, LIFE STILL FEELS LIKE A LIFE-SENTENCE? HOW DO WE GRIEVE AT A TIME WHEN EVERYTHING (EXCEPT THE PERSON WE LOVED) SEEMS TO BE COMING BACK TO LIFE? Easter. Passover. Spring. The days lengthen, grow warm. Everything seems to come back to life. Everything, that is, except […]
I FEED THIS GUINNESS STOUT CHOCOLATE LAYER CAKE TO MY FATHER ONLY IN MY DREAMS
IT’S ALMOST ST. PATRICK’S DAY, SO IT IS TIME FOR ME, AGAIN, TO OFFER YOU THIS GUINNESS STOUT CHOCOLATE LAYER CAKE. IF YOU’VE BEEN LOOKING FOR AN IRISH-ISH DESSERT THAT IS A KNOCK-YOUR-SOCKS-OFF WOW, THIS MAY IS IT. IT IS (SHE SAID MODESTLY), ONE OF THE THREE BEST CHOCOLATE DESSERTS I EVER CAME UP WITH, […]
THE GARLIC LADY IN FEBRUARY
I am the garlic lady, six pressed cloves on my spaghetti, and those bulbs as raw as myself or this blustery day which I shall spend at home, entertaining myself. I find my jokes enormously funny, and I know about herbs and botanicals, too. Take the pungent healing tuber I love to chew: it’s allium, […]
IMPEACH UPSIDE-DOWN CAKE
Given the day (February 10, 2021), and all we were in the middle of, it was always going to be something. Cobbler? Crisp? Pie? No! It was an IMPEACH UPSIDE-DOWN CAKE! To dessert-lovers, a good cake has no down side. Unless, of course, it happens to be an upside-down cake. (Go directly to recipe here.) To those […]
BEANBLOSSOM, CAT OF MY HEART, TEACHES ME ABOUT BECOMING LOVABLE
HOW DO WE BECOME LOVABLE, AS IN, ABLE TO GIVE AND RECEIVE LOVE? SOMETIMES, WE LEARN FROM CATS. OR A CAT, PARTICULARLY BELOVED. IN MY CASE, THAT WAS BEANBLOSSOM. The other morning, I was making breakfast. I cracked two eggs for an omelette, into a small stainless steel bowl. Beating them with a fork, hearing […]
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