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Crescent Dragonwagon

TIDINGS OF DISCOMFORT

TIDINGS OF DISCOMFORT

By Crescent Dragonwagon

Our beloved partner is no longer on earth. And now it’s the holidays. Sometimes other people, not realizing they’re doing it, ask us to dress grief up in party clothes. We may even ask it of ourselves. But we don’t have to do it. In the fall of 2004,  Richard, my friend Kay’s husband and the love of her life,… Read More

Filed Under: #WidowhoodWednesday, Fearless Living, widowhood Tagged With: grief, grieving, holiday depression, holiday grieving, holiday pressure, holidays, widow, widowhood

GROWING COMPASSION: SUICIDE, “SUICIDE WIDOWS”  & THE ANTHONY BOURDAIN AFFECT

GROWING COMPASSION: SUICIDE, “SUICIDE WIDOWS” & THE ANTHONY BOURDAIN AFFECT

By Crescent Dragonwagon

IF YOU’VE LOST A PARTNER TO SUICIDE, EXPECT TO REVISIT THAT PECULIARLY GUILT-TAINTED SORROW EVERY TIME A CELEBRITY EXITS LIFE BY HIS OR HER OWN HAND, OR ON THAT DEATH’S ANNIVERSARY. MAYBE IT’S TIME TO GROW SOME COMPASSION, ALL AROUND. Anthony Bourdain’s suicide four years ago hit me hard. Perhaps this was partly because Bourdain and I work / worked… Read More

Filed Under: #WidowhoodWednesday, Fearless Living, grief, self-understanding, personal growth, widowhood, writing Tagged With: Anthony Bourdain, cornbread, David R. Koff, grief, suicide, suicide widows, Until Just Moistened

BLOSSOMING, NO MATTER WHAT: A CHRISTMAS (CACTUS) STORY

BLOSSOMING, NO MATTER WHAT: A CHRISTMAS (CACTUS) STORY

By Crescent Dragonwagon

SOMETHING, SOMEWHERE, IS BLOOMING. NOW.  IT MAY NOT BE THE PLANT YOU WANTED OR EXPECTED. ITS TIMING MAY BE OFF, OR ODD, OR MYSTERIOUS. BUT BEFORE YOU GIVE OVER TO  DESPAIR, — EASY, IN THESE DIFFICULT AND UNENDINGLY STRESSFUL TIMES —  LOOK FOR THE BUD, THE BLOSSOM. IF IT CAN FLOWER IMPROBABLY, SO CAN YOU. 2012 was the last full… Read More

Filed Under: Nothing Is Wasted on the Writer Tagged With: aging, aging parents, Arkansas, Charlotte Zolotow, Christmas cactus, compassion towards self and others, David Koff, death, eldercare, friendship, grief, grieving, love, memoir, memoir-writing, writing

THE GRIEVING VOTE: WIDOWHOOD, COMPASSION & THE 2020 ELECTION

THE GRIEVING VOTE: WIDOWHOOD, COMPASSION & THE 2020 ELECTION

By Crescent Dragonwagon

“Her first husband died in a workplace accident when she was 24 and pregnant with their second child.  ‘Becoming a young widow changed my life,’ she said.” Suddenly, reading these words recently in the New York Times, sitting there at the old oak table in the kitchen, having breakfast, the hair on the back of my neck rose. There are… Read More

Filed Under: #WidowhoodWednesday, Fearless Living, grief, widowhood Tagged With: compassion, death, election, empathy, grief, Joe Biden, Neilia, widowhood

DEAR FRIEND OF THE WIDOW:  FOOLPROOF CONSOLATION, EIGHT WAYS TO HELP THE GRIEVING

DEAR FRIEND OF THE WIDOW: FOOLPROOF CONSOLATION, EIGHT WAYS TO HELP THE GRIEVING

By Crescent Dragonwagon

OUR FRIENDS WANT TO HELP US. THEY DON’T KNOW HOW. WE DON’T KNOW HOW EITHER. BECAUSE WE ARE RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF IT. DEAR WIDOW, I WROTE THIS LETTER FOR YOU TO GIVE YOUR FRIENDS. A LETTER TO THE WIDOW’S FRIENDS Dear Friend of the Widow, You already know this: ___________, the beloved life partner of your friend __________,… Read More

Filed Under: #WidowhoodWednesday, Fearless Living, grief, self-understanding, personal growth, widowhood Tagged With: condolence, friendship, grief, how to help a widow, sympathy

WIDOW, WILL YOU DANCE WITH ME? AN INVITATION

WIDOW, WILL YOU DANCE WITH ME? AN INVITATION

By Crescent Dragonwagon

My dear fellow member of the Club No One Wants to Join, I started Widowhood Wednesday just under a year ago. I was almost seventeen years past my first widowhood, almost three past my second. I was accompanying (to the extent it is possible that another person can accompany another in the freshets of recent grief), my recently widowed friend… Read More

Filed Under: #WidowhoodWednesday, Conversations with Crescent Classes, Crescent Dragonwagon, Events, Fearless Living, self-understanding, personal growth, widowhood Tagged With: community, grief, grieving, the Club No One Wants to Join

THE HOLIDAYS, AFTER A SUDDEN DEATH: HOW TO HELP

THE HOLIDAYS, AFTER A SUDDEN DEATH: HOW TO HELP

By Crescent Dragonwagon

HE DIED. SUDDENLY. AN ACCIDENT. THREE WEEKS LATER, THE WORST WINTER WEATHER IN THE STATE’S HISTORY BLEW IN. SOMETIMES DISASTERS COLLIDE SOMETIMES FRIENDS HOLD A PLACE FOR US WHEN WE CAN’T DO IT FOR OURSELVES. It is easy, looking back on the aftermath of the catastrophic theft of normalcy that is widowhood, to recall the hurtful, bone-headed remarks and deeds… Read More

Filed Under: #WidowhoodWednesday, Fearless Living Tagged With: accidental death, friends, grief, Mr. Rogers, sudden death, widow, widowhood

DOES IT GET EASIER? YES. DO YOU GET OVER IT? NO.

DOES IT GET EASIER? YES. DO YOU GET OVER IT? NO.

By Crescent Dragonwagon

I would like to tell you, dear fellow members of the Club No One Wants to Join, especially those younger to widowhood than I am, that it gets easier over time. And I can. For it does. It gets easier over time. I would also, so very much, like not to tell you that you never get over it. But… Read More

Filed Under: #WidowhoodWednesday, Fearless Living Tagged With: Crescent dragonwagon, gradual transformation, grief, grief & grieving, love, Ned Shank, widowhood, Widowhood Wednesday

GRIEF’S LOVE-LANGUAGE

GRIEF’S LOVE-LANGUAGE

By Crescent Dragonwagon

That last Thursday in November, I had been at Miller Williams‘ sixth or eighth Survey of Western Poetry class, which I was auditing at the University of Arkansas at Fayetteville.I’d drive over each Thursday — it was about an hour from Eureka Springs — immerse myself in Miller’s world, do any Fayetteville errands that I might have, and drive home…. Read More

Filed Under: #WidowhoodWednesday, Fearless Living Tagged With: death, Emily Dickinson, grief, Miller Williams, Ned Shank, poetry, poetry and grief, The Bustle in a House, widow

WHEN GRIEF WANTS TO BE FELT, IT WILL. BUT IT WON’T ALWAYS WANT TO.

WHEN GRIEF WANTS TO BE FELT, IT WILL. BUT IT WON’T ALWAYS WANT TO.

By Crescent Dragonwagon

You expect things like anniversaries. Like birthdays. Like Father’s Day (if he was the father of your children). Mother’s Day (if she was the mother of your children). Like “We would have been married 31 years today.” Like, looking at your watch and seeing the exact dark beat of time, when according to the death certificate, he or she crossed… Read More

Filed Under: #WidowhoodWednesday, Fearless Living Tagged With: grief, how long does it take, solar eclipse 2017, widow, widowhood, Widowhood Wednesday

GRIEF WILL NOT BE OUTSMARTED,  CERTAINLY NOT AT THE LAVINIA HOTEL

GRIEF WILL NOT BE OUTSMARTED, CERTAINLY NOT AT THE LAVINIA HOTEL

By Crescent Dragonwagon

Three months and eighteen days after Ned’s death, I took his ashes, as per his written request, to India. This was still relatively early days, so perhaps I can be forgiven for my persistent illusion: I still thought you could somehow outsmart grief. I did not yet know that when grief wants to be felt, it will find a way to… Read More

Filed Under: #WidowhoodWednesday, Fearless Living Tagged With: ashes, cremation, grief, grieving, Mount Lavinia, Sri Lanka, widowhood, Widowhood Wednesday

TABLE FOR ONE

TABLE FOR ONE

By Crescent Dragonwagon

“For months after Ned’s death I barely ate. (How could I taste, let alone digest, when my sweet partner had suddenly, absolutely vanished from the earth, could never close his eyes again in ecstasy at something so simple as a perfect baked red yam or a plate of pancakes?)”  I wrote most of  Passionate Vegetarian when Ned was alive. It… Read More

Filed Under: #WidowhoodWednesday, Fearless Living Tagged With: eating vegetables, grief, grieving, widowhood, Widowhood Wednesday

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Read Aloud with Crescent and Mark

NOT A LITTLE MONKEY, by Charlotte Zolotow, illustrted by Michelle Chessaree

"So, the little girl climbed into the big waste-basket and waited." ' Oh no,' said her mother, ' we don't want to throw you away.'"There are many ways to express love and the need for attention. Here, a busy mother and her just-a-bit naughty little girl tease each other affectionately — the little girl making her point without even uttering a word.That's today's story time — read aloud by the author's daughter at Crescent Dragonwagon's Writing, Cooking, & Workshops, with Mark Graff's "text support" and discussion."Just right for two-to-fours, the humor of this true-to-life story of a mischievous little girl who blocks her mother's attempts to clean house will elicit giggles from the lollipop set." Kirkus Reviews

Posted by Crescent Dragonwagon's Writing, Cooking, & Workshops on Thursday, June 4, 2020

Read Aloud with Crescent

Read Aloud with Crescent

The Washington Post on Crescent’s Lentil Soup Recipe

The Washington Post on Crescent’s Lentil Soup Recipe

Greek Lentil Soup with Spinach and Lemon, photograph by Tom McCorkle, Washington Post

Bean By Bean Cookbooks

#DeepFeast Recipes

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"(With) weary animals, Dragonwagon offers an “alphabet of ways to sleep,” smoothly working in some alliteration..."
- Publishers Weekly (starred review)


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Until Just Moistened

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