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Tag: grieving

TIDINGS OF DISCOMFORT

Posted on November 28, 2022November 30, 2022 by Crescent Dragonwagon

Our beloved partner is no longer on earth. And now it’s the holidays. Sometimes other people, not realizing they’re doing it, ask us to dress grief up in party clothes. We may even ask it of ourselves. But we don’t have to do it. In the fall of 2004,  Richard, my friend Kay’s husband and…

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BLOSSOMING, NO MATTER WHAT: A CHRISTMAS (CACTUS) STORY

Posted on December 25, 2021December 25, 2021 by Crescent Dragonwagon

SOMETHING, SOMEWHERE, IS BLOOMING. NOW.  IT MAY NOT BE THE PLANT YOU WANTED OR EXPECTED. ITS TIMING MAY BE OFF, OR ODD, OR MYSTERIOUS. BUT BEFORE YOU GIVE OVER TO  DESPAIR, — EASY, IN THESE DIFFICULT AND UNENDINGLY STRESSFUL TIMES —  LOOK FOR THE BUD, THE BLOSSOM. IF IT CAN FLOWER IMPROBABLY, SO CAN YOU….

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WIDOW, WILL YOU DANCE WITH ME? AN INVITATION

Posted on January 31, 2018February 1, 2018 by Crescent Dragonwagon

My dear fellow member of the Club No One Wants to Join, I started Widowhood Wednesday just under a year ago. I was almost seventeen years past my first widowhood, almost three past my second. I was accompanying (to the extent it is possible that another person can accompany another in the freshets of recent…

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A MILLION AND ONE: WHY WE TELL OUR STORY OVER & OVER

Posted on August 16, 2017August 20, 2017 by Crescent Dragonwagon

We are so tired of our story, so exhausted by it. We hate going over it and over it, yet we do, obsessively (one reason we feel insane, though we are not; we’ve grieving). We have exhausted all our friends, and we try not to burden them any more; they have been so good to…

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GRIEF WILL NOT BE OUTSMARTED, CERTAINLY NOT AT THE LAVINIA HOTEL

Posted on August 10, 2017August 12, 2017 by Crescent Dragonwagon

Three months and eighteen days after Ned’s death, I took his ashes, as per his written request, to India. This was still relatively early days, so perhaps I can be forgiven for my persistent illusion: I still thought you could somehow outsmart grief. I did not yet know that when grief wants to be felt, it…

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TABLE FOR ONE

Posted on August 2, 2017April 15, 2020 by Crescent Dragonwagon

“For months after Ned’s death I barely ate. (How could I taste, let alone digest, when my sweet partner had suddenly, absolutely vanished from the earth, could never close his eyes again in ecstasy at something so simple as a perfect baked red yam or a plate of pancakes?)”  I wrote most of  Passionate Vegetarian…

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